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When The Going Gets Tough
I was a huge Lost fan. The ABC drama starring Matthew Fox, who apparently isn’t the sweet Charlie we remember from Party of Five. I mean, the man likes his cocktails. Anyways, Lost was this great...
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A Mom’s Job Performance
You know how I feel about Oprah, (See Oprah Why So Deep?) so I won’t ever call what I had an Aha! moment. Let’s call it a, “Holy shit! That’s what has been pissing me off the whole time moment.” I...
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Hello, My Name Is Jen, and I Am A MOM
I have decided not to fight it anymore!!!! I am giving in. It has taken a lot time, but there is no avoiding it. I am a MOM. Sure I know I have written endless articles about parenting and my...
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Mom Adds Some Twists To The Giving Tree
As promised, I have been an asshole back to my kid since writing Mom Discovers A New Ailment. I did not pick him/her up from the bus stop a few times, I acted less interested in his/her day. I...
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A Relaxed Mom Gets Scared Too
I admit I have had complete writer’s block. Since last Friday I haven’t able to think of anything funny, let alone write anything funny. I, like everyone else in the world, have had a hand over my...
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A Mom Loves babyGap And Peter Rabbit
My kids are thirteen, ten, and nine, yet it seems like only yesterday they were babies. I reveled in dressing them in their adorable babyGap onesies and I made my weekly visits to their store where...
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A Mom Can’t Put Foot Down
Don’t you love when one of your all time favorite movies is showing for a month straight on HBO? I have caught Parenthood with Steve Martin twice already. I’ll tell you why I love it. Even though...
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Why Do My Kids Need to Grow Up?
I am back from my family vacation in Colorado. For one of our dinners we went to hibachi. I am sure all parents have gone to hibachi. It is my kids’ favorite type of restaurant. Me, every time I...
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Taylor Swift and I Will Never Break Up
I cried at Taylor Swift last night. Not because her unbelievable talent made me feel completely talentless. Not because watching her made me realize that I too would like to play the banjo but...
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A Mom Wants to Fess Up To Her Kids
You know you need a break from the everyday when you start offering sexual favors to your hubby if he would agree to take one of your kids to team pictures. You say prostitute, I say tired mommy....
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Why I’m A Good Mom.
How do I know I am a good mom? When you think about it, there are few things that we know for certain we can do, and were taught to do a certain way. Like riding a bike, tying our shoes, driving a...
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Men Like Quiet Time
A joke told to my husband by his straight hairstylist: What’s the best part of a blowjob? The five minutes of silence. That’s just funny. If you aren’t laughing, stop reading now. I’m always...
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Awkward Awkward Awkward
You know how all moms will tell other women that they just can’t imagine what it’s like to raise a child until you become a mom yourself? Well, I can tell you exactly what it’s like to have a...
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A Mom Packs Camp Trunks…Alone
I have ripped off every one of my fake nails. I am definitely drinking more this week. I am breaking out. I am on edge, calling my best friend an asshole when she asks me where we should have...
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A Mom Wants To Try Taco Bell
So let me catch you up a bit. I haven’t written in a few weeks. If you’ve been with me for a while you know how much I love my family summer vacations. This summer our trip was San Francisco,...
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A Mom’s Summer To Do List
How is it almost going to be the end of summer? (Don’t tell me summer ends at Labor Day weekend. Summer ends August 10th when the kids come off that plane looking a little too skinny and a little...
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A Mom Gets Smart For The New School Year
I am starting to pick at my nails a little more. I am starting to get that feeling that I have forgotten to do something. I am starting to get a little impatient with the hubby. I am starting to...
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Read, Kid, Read!!!
Last night I attended my 12,000 thousandth back to school night. I love my daughter’s teacher! She is amazing, sweet, and truly cares about the kids. The drill is the same at these open houses....
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It’s Us Against The Kids
I don’t know about your house, but there is one constant in mine. I’ll be having a discussion with my kids; it could be about them taking a shower, which believe you me, I have to discuss a lot with...
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A Mom Learns To Lie
Brad did this photoshoot right after he broke up with Jen Aniston. This is a little too honest. I am not this bad. Some might say I have the sensitivity of Brad Pitt while others might say I am the...
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